Next Stop: South Pole

(No, I’m not going to the South Pole, Mom! I promise!)

Laying out on the beach at my resort in Tangalle, Sri Lanka, I met an adorable Swiss couple in their mid-twenties, Lee and Priscilla. Lee and Priscilla come from Interlaken (coincidentally, I visited Interlaken en route to Grindelwald in 2001) and speak German, but Lee had studied in San Diego for a year and communicated well in English. Priscilla also understood a lot of English (a lot more than she realized when we first met!), but did not feel comfortable speaking more than a couple words at first. They are such a great couple! They’ve only been together three years, but they have spent as much of that time traveling as possible – they are both passionate about seeing the world and, spending time with them, one can easily see how that mutual passion strengthens their relationship. After talking for a bit, I told them I was going to walk to another beach that I had visited the previous day with a woman named Monika (more about awesome Monika later), because I wanted to collect sea shells. Lee asked if they could join me and I was happy to have them come along!

We spent the morning on “the seashell beach,” which had a really cool Buddhist altar on a patch of green that jutted out into the water. We drank fresh juice from a beachside restaurant called Turtle Landing, and I ate some delicious fresh shrimp there as well. Around 1:00, we decided to head back and they invited me to join them to do some sightseeing that afternoon. I gladly accepted the invitation because I had not made any sightseeing plans in Sri Lanka and they already had a driver arranged to take them to a lighthouse and a couple Buddhist temples. I wasn’t super excited about seeing a lighthouse, but I thought, what the heck, I’ll check it out.

I am so glad I did. Dondra Head Lighthouse, the tallest lighthouse in Sri Lanka and one of the tallest in Asia, is located almost at the southernmost tip of Sri Lanka. In fact, standing at the lighthouse, you are literally at the end of the world: the next landmass to the south is the South Pole!

We were the only tourists at the lighthouse when we arrived, and we entered to find a couple of guys who worked there (it is still an active lighthouse). For a small fee, they allowed us to climb to the top of the lighthouse. There were a lot of stairs. When we reached the top, we opened a small door and climbed out onto the ledge.

To say that the view was breathtaking is inadequate. I have never, in my life, seen a more spectacular view anywhere in the world. We were all speechless for at least a full minute after we stepped outside. There we were, standing alone on top of the world, basically at the end of the world, looking out at the vast Ocean and the landscape of this magnificent country. I will post some videos, but there is just no way to capture that feeling. The clean, brisk air, the birds flying below, perfect spots of bright white clouds, blue water crashing ferociously into the rocks below, and the endless Ocean. That experience with nature was far more spiritual for me than any church or temple I have visited before or since. Just beautiful.

I have no idea how long we were up there. It could have been 15 minutes or an hour. I was just lost in the moment. Eventually, we started back down the stairs and ran into at least 30 tourists on their way up. We had come at the perfect time.

• Click this link for a video from the top of the lighthouse. 
• Click this link for another video from the top of the lighthouse.

After leaving the lighthouse, we went to a nearby Buddhist temple that was hundreds of years old and fed bananas to the temple elephants in the yard. 

 

Then we drove to another temple, on top of which sat a magnificent giant Buddha, maybe eight stories high and covered in mosaic tile. The inside of the temple had amazing sculptures and paintings, some over 600 years old. 

 

It started sprinkling a bit as we were leaving the temple, but the rain passed by the time we reached the resort. After freshening up in our cabanas, we met for dinner at the restaurant and later shared a bottle of South African wine on my verandah. It was a wonderful day spent with wonderful people – Priscilla was using English quite a bit by the end of the day – and I was sad that they would be leaving the next day for Mirissa Beach.

The next day, Wednesday, I spent most of the day at the beach and at my villa planning the last few days of my trip. I needed to do some souvenir shopping, so I decided to head to Galle, a city built in and around an old Dutch fort about two hours away. Thursday morning, I went down to meet my driver and the hotel manager, Rohan, informed me that Lee and Priscilla had left a small item behind and they had called asking if I could send it to them. Rohan told them that I was heading to Galle, so they messaged me asking if I could pick them up on the way! I was more than happy to see my friends again, so my driver stopped in Mirissa, where we picked up the Swiss kids, and then we went together to Galle.

We had a lovely day eating and shopping in the cute colonial town. Galle reminded me a little of Valetta, Malta, which was a fusion of British architecture and customs with African cultural influences. Galle had a definite European flair, but the Asian influences were a constant reminder of how far away they had come from colonial times. The shops were great and the company was such a pleasure! Late afternoon, we returned to the car and headed one town over to drop Lee and Priscilla at their new hotel in Unawatuna. Again, I was sad to part with them, but it was so nice to get to spend another day together.

On the drive from Unawatuna to Tangalle, my driver told me a little about the impact of the 2004 Tsunami on Southern Sri Lanka. He was actually one of two men from the district who attended a post-Tsunami training camp in Thailand. He returned as a manager of the rebuilding process, a job he held for two years when the project was complete. I was surprised to learn that Tangalle and Galle were two of the hardest hit cities in the Tsunami. Over 40,000 people in Sri Lanka lost their lives in the Tsunami, many from this area. If you are interested in learning more about the Tsunami, which killed 250,000 people in 18 countries, there is a documentary available on YouTube that I’ve watched twice. Also, the film The Impossible with Ewan Macgregor and Naomi Watts is excellent.

Today is November 20. On the morning of November 23, I will head to Colombo to spend the day before flying to Mumbai that evening. From Mumbai, I will be coming back to America. Time has flown.

Sri Lanka

On the evening of Thursday, November 13, I flew from Jaipur to Mumbai. After a layover in Mumbai, my plane departed for Sri Lanka around 2 am on November 14. I arrived in Colombo (the largest city, but no longer the capitol) around 5:30 in the morning, completely exhausted. Fortunately, Shanti from Amber Tours arranged for a driver to pick me up from the airport so I did not have to think about anything. I had been sick the last few days in Jaipur and was still feeling weak (although the doctor had cleared me to travel), so I fell asleep for awhile in the car. The driver was friendly and pointed out some nice sights along the three-hour drive (when I was awake) to my destination: Tangelle.

The first thing I noticed about Sri Lanka is how completely different it is from India. I don't know what I expected having very little prior knowledge of this tiny country, but I guess I thought it would be like India shrunken into an island. I could not have been more wrong! Everyone who follows this blog knows that I am completely in love with India, the people, the culture, the sights, etc., and I rarely write about problems in the country because I am so overwhelmed by its beauty. But, for the record, there is one HUGE problem with India: it is dirty. By dirty, I mean heavy pollution in the air and water, trash piled on streets and sidewalks, and sickly animals running the streets and leaving feces behind. This is just a fact of life in India, and the Indian people want the government to clean up the country (and there is hope that PM Modi will make some improvements, particularly with water sanitation and sewage systems). Just to be clear, while the cities are shockingly dirty to Westerners, the Indian people are not dirty. In fact, the people are so clean that they eat with their hands. (I know I personally don't wash my hands as frequently as they do). I've heard Westerners make offensive comments about Indians smelling bad, which is just plain ignorant. Indians fill their homes with fresh flowers and jasmine incense. They use the sweetest smelling natural perfumes and oils on their skin. One of the things I missed most last time I came home from India was the smell. Yes, the trash stinks, but that's universal - who's s&*t smells like roses? (Cue Outkast...)

So, major difference in Sri Lanka: It is clean! The streets are cleared of litter and people can actually go running on the sidewalks without falling over a heap of trash. This was a refreshing sight, for sure. There is less traffic, since the population of the entire country is only 19 million (equal to the population of Delhi, India's third largest city), and less obvious pollution. The skies are clear.

My driver said that the urban landscape has improved significantly since the Tsunami in 2004. Over 40,000 Sri Lankans lost their lives in the Tsunami (50,000 by some estimates); they had to rebuild basically half the country.

After a nice drive from Colombo to the Southern Province, we arrived at my resort: Palm Paradise Cabanas  in Tangalle (aka "Tangalla"). I had originally booked an open air cabana on stilts with mosquito netting around the bed but no A/C (about $25 USD per night) because I'm broke and a seasoned traveler - who needs A/C anyway?

Me, as it turns out. After sweating it out for about 20 minutes, I walked to reception and asked about the Villas on the hill. For $60 USD more per night, you get A/C, glass windows and free wi-fi in your villa. Suddenly, I didn't feel so broke...

The cabanas are actually really neat, but not for someone recovering from being sick and exhausted from weeks of traveling.

So I moved from here...

   Cabana Video

to here...

Villa Video

...and then I was happy.

Here's a video of the walkway to the beach.

Tangelle is not on the above map of Sri Lanka, but it is located near Hambantota is on the southeast tip. It is definitely the most naturally beautiful place I have ever seen. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves...

Goyambokka Beach, Tangelle, Sri Lanka

Happiness

Another photo of the beautiful beach at my resort

Drinking coconut water from an orange coconut - naturally filtered!

Lone fisherman - I watch him every morning.

Buddhist altar on a narrow green spot jutting out into the Ocean. A vast majority (over 80%) of Sri Lankans are Buddhist; about 18% are Hindu.

Exploring another beach in Tangelle

Thanks for reading! More to follow...

Mansions to Sell and Mouths to Feed

I have been watching the first season of Boardwalk Empire with my trial membership to Amazon Prime (yes, the trial membership is totally selling me on the Prime thing). The show is excellent. The writing, acting, costumes, set design, everything. There are also some really thought-provoking scenes, one of which I haven't stopped thinking about.

A little background (without any spoilers I hope): Margaret Schroeder is a young woman, recently widowed, with two young children, living in Atlantic City in the early 1920's. She has had a difficult life - she is an Irish immigrant, poor, and her late husband was very abusive - but she is determined, intelligent and brave. She is somewhat politically-minded, vocal about her support for suffrage for women and involved with "The Temperance League," a group of conservative women who push for prohibition of alcohol and enforcement of the law. Despite her strong character, Schroeder hides behind a soft-spoken, demure cloak for the first half of the Season; these traits are slowly revealed over the first 7-8 episodes.

In Episode 6, titled "Family Limitation," Margaret Schroeder has finally found a job as a mistreated "shop girl," but it is clearly not the type of job that will sustain her family without her husband's income. She is working hard, but quite desperate and unable to provide for her children. [It is worth noting that these were the days where "shop girl" was the best job a woman could hope for, unless she wanted to work in a brothel or could find a job in the show business industry.]

Schroeder receives an "offer" from a wealthy and powerful man, an offer that would provide for her family in exchange for her "companionship." Schroeder is attracted to the man, and seems like she wants to accept the offer, but she knows that he will never marry her due to cultural norms. She is obviously concerned about her reputation in the community (and possibly has her own moral/religious misgivings, but it is hard to tell at this point) and what kind of future lies ahead. Before making a decision, she seeks the advice of an older woman she respects, Mrs. McGarry, the head of the Temperance League.

The scene that captivated me is this meeting, where Schroeder tells McGarry that she has received an "offer" from a man and doesn't know what to do. McGarry, a strong and straightforward woman with perfectly coiffed gray hair and sharp features, cuts right to the chase, asking is this offer "financial, domestic, sexual?" Schroeder replies that is is all of the above. McGarry then tells Schroeder a story about her late husband, a wealthy businessman who built a mansion for himself and his wife and passed away shortly thereafter. McGarry says that, upon her husband's passing, she sold the mansion, bought a small place and devoted her life to women's suffrage and prohibition efforts.

As a viewer, I reacted to this story with the same sentiment that Schroeder seems to feel: confusion. Is McGarry suggesting that Schroeder devote her life to political causes? Perhaps McGarry thinks that there will be more opportunities for women to provide for themselves if they receive the right to vote? I am waiting for the part where McGarry draws some analogy to her story and lectures Schroeder not to "whore herself out," but that is not what happens. Schroeder pauses for a second after McGarry finishes her story and then says, "But I do not have a mansion to sell."

McGarry responds, "Exactly. So you must do as you see fit." McGarry then hands Schroeder a copy of Margaret Sanger's "Family Limitation" pamphlet [Sanger authored the first publicly available information on birth control in the U.S. - learn about her here], and sends her on her way.

This scene was so powerful for so many reasons, not the least of which is the way it highlights the difficulties women faced in the early 20th century. I feel like it goes beyond that, however, and presents a lesson relevant to us today. There are those of us who have mansions to sell, and those of us who have nothing, yet society holds everyone to the same standard. Those with nothing are expected to accomplish everything; if they do not provide for their families through legitimate, honest means, we call them crooks. If they rely on government resources to supplement their meager income, to provide food for their children, we call them lazy. If they drop out of school to start working, we call them losers. If they ask us for help, we tell them to "go find a job," as if the jobs available to us are equally available to them.

Those of us who have come from a privileged background, financially, socially, or otherwise, need to look at the lives of those who come from underprivileged backgrounds the same way that Mrs. McGarry does: realistically. This is not about helping others or contributing to charitable causes, even though those of you who know me know that I strongly advocate those things; this is about learning to see the world differently, understanding that those with privileged backgrounds cannot possibly comprehend the desperation of, say, a teenage girl, sleeping on the floor of her grandmother's boyfriend's apartment, skipping classes to make a few dollars braiding hair, eating only every other day or so, who finds herself pregnant by her grandmother's boyfriend's adult cousin. How can those with mansions to sell have any concept of what is best for this young girl? They cannot, yet they do it every day. Judging her. Screaming at her if she even looks at the Planned Parenthood building. Refusing to give her bus fare and telling her to go find a job. Looking at her like she is a whore. Voting to deprive her of her access to prenatal care, food stamps, shelter.

I think the better attitude is that of Mrs. McGarry: You must do as you see fit.

Learn to fly however you can without hurting others, little bird. Survive, even if you don't have a reason to. Hold on to hope. Look away from the judgmental eyes of those who have never known life in your shoes. Hold your head up high. Learn to fly.

On Traveling Solo

When folks hear that I’m planning to travel alone to a foreign country, they typically ask one or both of the following questions:

1. Aren’t you scared?

2. What will you do all by yourself?

My answer to the first question is simply, “No.” I rarely feel the need to elaborate because I don’t think I could explain why I am not scared to someone who would think to ask the question. I’m not criticizing the question – I get it. I understand why some people, especially people who have not traveled alone, would think of it as frightening. The reason why I am not scared is difficult to explain because it is so much a part of who I am. I have been traveling in foreign countries over half my life, and most of those trips have been either solo or with one other person.

Only once, when I was fifteen years old, did I travel with a group. It was my first time overseas and I went with a group of about twenty students from around the US on a 3-week tour of the Mediterranean. I enjoyed the tour immensely, but even then my favorite moments were those precious hours of “free time” where I was free to explore a city by myself. It seemed magical, disappearing in a crowd of locals, essentially invisible and free to watch people without them noticing that I was a stranger in a foreign land. Once, when I had wandered off during free time in Rome, I came upon a crowd of people lining up outside a beautiful church. They seemed excited, so I jumped in the line with them, having absolutely no idea what we were lining up for.

Suddenly, the doors of the church opened and the most elegant and fashionably dressed woman emerged with a group of people also dressed in gorgeous dresses and suits. The people in the line cheered as the woman and her entourage proceeded down the line, shaking hands with the people. When she reached me, I stuck out my hand and smiled. She smiled gently, gracefully, and took my hand in hers. I shivered when I felt her soft skin – her hands were as smooth as a newborn child’s – these were the hands of a woman who had never washed clothes, done the dishes, scrubbed a bathroom floor. “Who is she?” I wondered, “And who are the people following her, also shaking my hand and smiling?” They couldn’t be movie stars – I would have recognized them, and there would be a bigger crowd forming. As they drove away, I wondered whether I would ever find out the answer to those questions.

Later that day, when I returned to the tour group, our guide made an exciting announcement: “The Queen of Spain was here in Rome today, visiting a church with the princess and her fiance. You can see her on the television!”

I had shaken hands with Queen Sofia of Spain.

Queen Sofia

Would this have happened if I had been traveling with the group? Probably not. If I had been traveling with another person? Perhaps, depending on whether that person was willing to stand in a line that was not moving for half an hour for no apparent reason. You see, when you are alone, you make all the decisions. That brings me to my usual response to the second question.


What do I do when I’m traveling alone?

Whatever I want.


***
Side Note: I also shook hands with Princess Cristina and her fiance, Olympic athlete Inaki Urdangarin, who married about a year later in Barcelona.

***

Another Side Note: Admittedly, there is one person who I enjoy traveling with just as much as I enjoy traveling alone - perhaps more - my bestie Nancy Rhinehart DeVetter. Here we are on our two-month backpacking trip around Europe after we graduated from high school in 1999:

Some of the best moments of my life have been those spent with Nancy. Both of us feel like that trip in particular was a life-changing experience. A few years later, we returned to Europe to study abroad - I spent the year in Besancon, France and Nancy studied in Salamanca, Spain, but we managed to find several opportunities to travel together that year as well.

Right before I left for this trip to India and Sri Lanka, I received a package in the mail from Nancy: a USB drive with a collection of songs about traveling and enjoying life. I often feel like Nancy is with me when I venture out into the world.